Not 24 hours after swearing I wouldn't do it, out pops a horror story. WTF is wrong with me?
Madame M's shop has seen better days. What began thirty years ago as a quest to bring truth to the lost and lonely through tarot is now just a cynical ploy to bilk old timers out of their pension money.
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Case in point. Edna Thomas just left here on cloud nine, after handing you $450. You assured her Prince Charming is on the way, his gallant steed primed to lift her from her lonely remorse.
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And, fuck it all, Marlene, you always end your reading with me. They might call me the Fool, but I see things. You used to know about me, Marlene. You used to believe. What happened?
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You sit there, counting your loot. This won't do.
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Marlene. Oh, Marlene. Don't look at me like you can't hear me. The time has come. You've gone too far. The ledger must be balanced.
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Yes, I know you're frightened. It's on your sallow face. You should be. Marlene, we are going to play a little game. You are going to pull the cards, and I am going to read them.
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Sit down, Marlene! Shut the fuck up and play this game with me! Don't make me do something foolish. Here's the game. You get to pull five cards. One at a time. And, guess what? Your fate? In your hands. Sounds like fun!
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Oh, Marlene, don't be such a stick in the mud. Pull a card. No, silly, you can't refuse. If you aren't going to have fun with this… Pull. A. Card. That's it, Marlene. See how easy that was?
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What have you pulled? Ouch, the three of Swords! Bang! Right to the heart. Does that hurt, Marlene? Did that sting a little? The heart is a tender muscle. Well, better luck with this one. Go on, Marlene. Pull another card. Oh, you're such a killjoy! Pull!
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Eek! Another banger, that 10 of swords. I remember you told old man Fisher it was the end of his sorrow and the beginning of his new life not long ago. Did I mention that Mr Fisher passed? But you got his $500 first. Sweet. The proper reading here is just the end. No beginning. Just an end. All those swords at once! Yikes! That had to hurt, Marlene!
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But don't stop now, pull! Oh stop crying! You can dish it, but you can't take it, Marlene. Do you know how Ms Rowland felt when her daughter didn't call, like you assured her she would? 10 blades is a small price, Marlene. Pull. Your hesitation is pissing me off, Marlene. There we go.
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What have we here? The Devil! Come calling. For you, Marlene. He’s bending you over the table like a pretzel. And what is that thing? I did not want to see that! Oh, honey are you OK? Did you enjoy that? Didn't think so, looked kinda rough. But two cards to go, maybe your fortunes will change. Sit down, Marlene! I'm sure it does hurt, but we have more cards to play. Pull another card, Marlene. Don't make me do it for you.
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The Tower? You sure know how to pick em, girl. Yes, I think you're right, the boiler did just blow. That's a nasty hot flame. Better hurry and pull that last card, Marlene! Save yourself!
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Oh dear. Death. Who knew? Next life, Marlene, don't be a fucking charlatan. Too many strikes and you risk your immortal soul. Nice playing with you, Marlene. It's too hot for me in here, gotta run.